Avoidants do feel the loss

Channel: Mack Herman
Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1e66pOQgRY

An avoidant may genuinely regret losing you, but regret is passive and silent -- do not mistake it for the active repair that actually rebuilds trust.

Key points

• Regret shows up as watching your stories, vague check-ins, hovering nearby without stepping in -- it wants comfort, not accountability.
• Repair is the opposite: it names the hurt, takes ownership, and demonstrates changed behavior.
• "I miss you" is not a bid for repair; don't let an avoidant's longing pull you back to a version of them that hasn't done the work.