They're not trying to trap you¶

Avoidants love bomb not out of manipulation but because they genuinely believe the fantasy of connection -- until real need breaks the illusion.

Key points¶

Avoidants crave connection but only feel safe wanting it while it is still imaginary and they have not yet risked being truly known.
They idealize you and shower attention sincerely; the retreat happens the moment you need something back and the fantasy becomes real.
They did not lie -- they meant it until you needed them, at which point intimacy felt unsafe and they panicked and withdrew.