When they pop back up out of nowhere, have your words ready¶

Five ready-made responses for when an avoidant comes back, covering the full range from open curiosity to a firm closed door.

Key points¶

"The open door": willing to hear them out, but you have changed and need to know they are not just returning for convenience.
"The closed chapter": you cared deeply but taught yourself to live without them and will not unlearn that.
"The curious mirror": ask what made them reach out now, then let the silence ride -- timing and people change.
"The soft confrontation": before moving forward, you need to know why they left the way they did.
"The power pivot": you are not the same version they left; if they are holding on to that old version, stop there.