5 THINGS to NEVER DO during a breakup when WOMEN pull AWAY or LEAVE YOU! (This Lowers Attraction)¶
Channel: Casey Zander
Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_WtUWOILMOc
Five mistakes the speaker says men make after being dumped that lower attraction; the prerequisite premise is that you cannot verbally convince a woman to love you, so silence is the only move that might make her reconsider.
Key points¶
- Prerequisite: you cannot talk a woman back into loving you. Once she sees you are head over heels, attached, and in love, it turns her off, so silence is your only tool. Expect a wave of emotion pushing you to be reactive; recognizing it is what lets you stay silent.
- 1. Do not let your mind get reactive. The instinct is to fix the problem (call, text, even contact her friends), but the same fix-it drive that serves men with health, finances, or a broken light bulb backfires here. It devalues you and hands her all the leverage. Complete silence signals you have the strength to walk away, which may make her second-guess.
- 2. Do not use logic to justify her emotion. Her leaving is an emotional state saying she thinks she can do better; long texts, paragraphs, and calls only confirm she should go because they prove how invested you are.
- 3. Never ask to talk. "Can we talk / please call me" is begging her to accept your attention; her non-reply means your attention has no value to her.
- 4. Never apologize or promise to do better. This is self-qualifying into her frame. A woman tolerates bad behavior from a man she is drawn to (distant, doesn't call back, doesn't seem to care); arguing your case marks you as not understanding the dynamic.
- 5. Never keep reaching out. If she wants a break or to leave, say "okay" and stop. Anything more lowers your dating value.
- Closing claim: the speaker says his relationships only worked when he never said anything serious and the women knew little about him; once they knew him on a deeper level, the mystery vanished and they pulled away.
Reception¶
- Strongly receptive; many older commenters call it true and say they learned it the hard way over years or decades.
- A recurring theme: men report being worshipped until they revealed love, then dumped, framing attachment as the attraction-killer.
- Several frame it through detachment philosophy ("attachment is the root of all suffering," a "Buddhist paradox"), and one likens the speaker to "the Alan Watts of female nature."
- Many endorse strict no-contact and refusing to take her back if she returns ("when it's done it's done").
- Pushback from a minority: putting absolutes on everything is inflexible, it takes two to wreck a relationship, and rejecting a returning woman of value out of ego is foolish.
- A vein of fatalism and resentment runs through the top comments ("it's a game you can't win," "the disappointment is forever").