The hard truth is, sometimes, you're waiting on their portential, not truly them¶

You are not waiting for who your partner is -- you are waiting for who they could be if they healed, and that version lives only in your hopes.

Key points¶

The good moments were real, but consistency, not chemistry or glimpses of softness, is what reveals who someone truly is.
An avoidant may briefly show up after nearly losing you, but that effort is driven by fear of losing access, not a sustained change.
Asking yourself how much longer you will abandon yourself waiting for someone to become who they are not choosing to be is the key question.