You're not crazy for questioning it¶

Avoidants can genuinely care and love -- the problem is not their feelings but their capacity to sustain intimacy when it becomes real.

Key points¶

Caring and being capable are two different things; avoidants can feel deeply and mean what they say in the moment.
When intimacy requires consistency, vulnerability, and accountability, the avoidant's nervous system shifts -- not because of anything you did, but because closeness itself felt like pressure.
Deactivation looks cold from the outside, but it is a survival response to overwhelm, not proof that the connection was fake.
Stop questioning your worth; question their capacity instead.